After ‘trad wives’ controversy, ‘provider women’ go viral

You’ve heard of “trad wives.” Now, meet the “provider women.”
A new term has emerged online − and unlike “trad wives,” which describes women who embrace cooking, cleaning and often subservience to their husbands, this one describes women who are the breadwinners. “Provider women” work to bring home the income while their male partners take on household duties like cooking and cleaning.
“Provider women” aren’t uncommon or new. According to Pew Research Center, the share of marriages in which wives out-earn their husbands has increased steadily from 5% in 1972 to 16% in 2022.
Still, the term has sparked strong reactions recently − and experts say the discourse highlights our society’s conflicting views on gender and how, ultimately, there’s no one way to delegate responsibilities within a relationship.
“The key takeaway is that roles in relationships should be tailored to each couple’s unique needs and desires,” says Amy Chan, a dating coach and author of “Breakup Bootcamp: The Science of Rewiring Your Heart.” “Whether a woman chooses to be a ‘trad wife,’ a ‘provider woman’ or something in between, the most important thing is that the partnership fosters mutual respect and support.”
Most of the discourse around provider women has stemmed from one couple in particular.
On TikTok, Levi Coralynn and William Conrad offer their 3 million combined followers a glimpse into their relationship, where Coralynn, an influencer and OnlyFans creator, brings home most of the money while Conrad does most of the cooking and cleaning. Conrad shows himself cooking elaborate meals on his account, and Coralynn eats and reviews his dishes on her account.
Conrad does other things for Coralynn too. He’s filmed himself cleaning the bathroom, braiding her hair and painting her toenails. On TikTok, Coralynn has encouraged women to be more assertive in their relationships. “Girls, women, I need you to do something for me this week. I want you to ask your partner to cook for you,” she says in a video with over a million views. “Say what you want. … Tell them exactly what you want for dinner, because sometimes men don’t know what you want. Sometimes you’ve got to tell them.”
Though Coralynn hasn’t described herself as a “provider woman,” that hasn’t stopped people online from labeling her. In a joint interview with Dazed Digital last week, Coralynn said she wasn’t familiar with the term but “kind of likes it,” with Conrad adding it describes her “very well.” USA TODAY has reached out to the couple for further comment.
Together, Coralynn and Conrad have amassed a loyal fanbase who admire their relationship and the affection they show one another. “I’ve been having the worst day and you two always sunshine my day up,” one TikToker commented. “you guys truly teach me so much about healthy relationships,” wrote another.
Not everyone, however, is supportive. One Instagram commenter accused Coralynn and other provider women of “getting women out of their femininity and men out of their masculinity.”
Female breadwinners know this kind of backlash all too well. “This isn’t something that is talked about a lot,” one woman says in a TikTok. “When I have touched on the fact that I am the breadwinner in my relationship or that I am the higher earner, I have received some fairly negative comments from people telling me that it’s somehow wrong or it’s somehow insensitive that I’m talking about it or that it means something about my relationship.”
In reality, there’s nothing wrong or unusual with women making more money than their partners, psychotherapist Stephanie Sarkis says. What’s new, however, is the attempt to label and categorize these women, something that Sarkis says is likely driven by the fervor on TikTok for new, buzzy, viral terms.
“There have always been differences in relationship structures or differences in gender roles,” she says. “This isn’t really anything new. It’s just that now social media is exposing us to other ways that people live.”
Provider women stand in stark contrast to trad wives, who have gone viral on TikTok for promoting a “traditional” relationship style. Many trad wives draw on aesthetics from the 1950s and discuss giving authority to their husbands, who are the sole breadwinners.
Though seemingly polar opposites, trad wives and provider women have one thing in common: They both challenge people to think more deeply about gender roles and the impact they have on relationships.
“People aren’t buying into tradition for tradition’s sake anymore,” Chan says. “One positive thing about social media is that we are exposed to so many different possibilities of how a relationship structure can look, instead of feeling you have to follow the example of your parents or friend group.”
What is a ‘trad wife’?These controversial women are drawing attention – and opinions
When you’re dating − no matter if you want to be a trad wife, a provider woman or something else − Sarkis and Chan agree it’s crucial to be on the same page as your partner about this topic. Otherwise, the relationship likely won’t last.
“The most successful relationships are those where both partners openly communicate and make choices that align with their shared values and goals,” Chan says. “There is no longer a single predominant relationship or family structure. By discussing and acknowledging the diverse ways people form relationships and families, we help remove the shame associated with deviating from the traditional status quo.”